Friday, August 24, 2012

Countdown to Orgasm

Through conditioning and training some women claim they can orgasm on command. This to me seems entirely impossible. I'm not going to outright call anyone who claims this a liar, but if it's true that's a pretty big evolutionary misstep. I think if it were possible there'd also be men who could, just out of the blue, ejaculate on command. And there'd be videos of it.

That's not to say we have entirely no conscious control over our orgasms. One trick some tops like to teach their subs is the countdown trick. You count from 10 down to 0, and when you hit 0 your sub comes. It almost sounds like a simple trick, but perfecting it takes some work. Nonetheless, it's a fun trick, and useful in many situations. It's also not magic; your pet is being fully stimulated during the countdown. What this gives you is an easy way to stop before your sub comes, but only after bring him to the very, very edge in the process.

I'll explain how to go about training your pet to do this neat trick. Keep in mind some guys just can't do this. I don't know if it's a mental block, something physical, lack of will power, or just some random genetic trait. Nonetheless, it seems most men can learn this, especially the easier versions of it. Don't feel bad if you just can't get it down, but don't be too quick to give up either. It can take a lot of practice.

First, for this trick to work, your sub needs to be sufficiently aroused. I suggest edging for a little bit before attempting the trick. Like I said before, there's no magic involved here. This is simply a form of control your pet can learn. While part of this is speeding up the path to orgasm, the majority of it is holding back. If your pet can't tell when he gets close to the edge, and often goes over on accident, then, likely, this trick isn't for him.

Also, when counting down, always go at a steady pace. You could watch the ticking of a clock to steady your countdown, but you should be fine keeping a constant speed in your mind. If you are varying the time between numbers too much, it will be difficult for your sub to learn this form of control. Don't play games with the speed of your countdown. Also, if it seems that 10 seconds is too long or too short for your sub, then try adjusting the length of the count down.

There are three stages to teaching your pet this trick. Since orgasms are required for this trick, you will have to teach your sub this over a period of time. Upon reaching the first stage, your sub will masturbate and when you hit 0, he will orgasm. To be more specific, cum will physically come out of his cock when you hit 0. Some people skip this stage, but I find it makes things a lot easier on both you and your sub. And if your pet can't pull this off, then you know the other two stages are likely unreachable.

To train your sub to do the first stage of this trick, after edging for a bit, simply have your sub masturbate as you count down. Start at 10 and work your way to 0. You sub is allowed to call you off at any point in the countdown, but is not allowed to stop masturbating or even slow down unless he has done so. You sub can call off your countdown either because he is too close already, or because he knows he won't be able to come at 0. Simply wait 10 to 30 seconds and start again. Internally he'll have to learn how much time he needs for hitting the point of no return and actual ejaculate spewing out of his dick. This tends to be about 2 seconds but varies from person to person. Once your pet feels he has this stage of the trick down, do a simple test. Tease him or have him tease himself until he thinks he's ready, then begin your countdown to 0 and don't allow him to stop masturbating or interrupt your countdown. You can visually see when your sub is able to perform stage one of the trick.

In the second stage of the trick you are the one stimulating your sub during the countdown. For you, this will be very similar to the first stage, but for your pet it will be a lot more difficult. Despite not being allowed to slow down, your pet has probably be varying the speed at which he has been masturbating, or varying the pressure or grip to achieve the same effect. Again, allow your sub to call off your countdown at any point. As with the previous stage, the same simple test can be used to confirm your pet has learned this stage of the trick.

To learn the third and final stage of the trick, your sub will have to make some sacrifices to his orgasm satisfaction. This time, when you hit 0 on your countdown, your sub will be hitting the point of no return. This isn't any easier than the previous two steps because your sub has probably learned how to adjust the time between reaching the point of no return, and the point of cum erupting from his cock. So this is more than just unlearning the extra second or two for ejaculation. This requires even more control and is the least enjoyable stage for your pet to learn. When he's done it properly, he has a completely ruined orgasm.

This trick is harder to verify because your pet could hit the point of no return at 1, and even after stimulation stops at 0, come as if 0 were the point of no return. Once your pet thinks he has mastered the trick, you have to perform a test which is essentially a teasing and denial session that ends in a ruined orgasm. Again, once your pet thinks he is ready, you begin counting down to 0, but you don't go all the way. When you get to 2, you stop. Tell him to let you know when it's OK to start again. This cool down time is also something he will have to learn, but don't let him go too long (more than 30 seconds) unless has failed this test a couple times due to not being ready. You need to repeat this at least 3 or 4 times stopping near the end of your countdown, but not at 0. It's important that you stop at 1 at least once, but multiple times is probably better. This makes sure he's not hitting the point of no return too early. I suggest stopping at 4, 3, 2, and 1, but not necessarily in that order.

Your sub may be failing the tests at this last stage of training to receive a more full orgasm. Even if you don't think he would do that, he may be doing it on a subconscious level. I hate to sound heartless, but if you feel your sub's cock contracting or you otherwise think he may have hit the point of no return before you counted down to 0, stop stimulation immediately. This will either result in a false alarm, which means you can then continue the test; you're suppose to stop at random points along the way anyway. Or it will result in a ruined orgasm for your sub. Ruined orgasms aren't very fun but it's a sacrifice your pet will have to make to learn this trick and prove to you he is able to perform it.

Once your pet has this down you can use this trick to better tease your pet. You can be certain he is at the very edge when you are edging him. This lets you know for certain your pet is really being brought to the edge. You will have to ruin an orgasm now and again to make sure he's staying honest about 0 being the point of no return, but the majority of the time you use this trick you can simply keep going after hitting 0. I suggest that the penalty for not being honest about 0 is a ruined orgasm (as not to encourage this as a way to avoid a ruined orgasm), followed by a reasonable amount of time with no orgasm at all.


  1. i've got a question for you.
    my husband recently revealed to me (with great shame and hesitance) that when he masturbates he gives himself blue balls. for days afterward he is in pain, and cannot get an erection.
    my question is this-i think it obvious my husband is a submissive...and perhaps he wants/desires/needs to be punished. i know nothing about this, but i want him to be happy.
    he states that he's ashamed of the blue balls situation, and has never told anyone.
    he's extremely embarrassed and wants to stop the act, but i don't think it's necessary.
    what approach do you think i should take, sexually speaking??

    1. Submissive husbandJune 3, 2013 at 11:45 PM

      I'm not the author of this blog, but just wanted to give you some input from a submissive guy's perspective. Unless he's suffering from some physical condition which makes him physically unable to ejaculate then it sounds like he's seeking your approval to orgasm. Sounds like you should have a conversation, and if taking on a dominant role turns you on, then I'd start exploring.

      Admitting to submissive desires may be embarrassing for a guy. I was the same when exploring different types of sex with my wife as we explored switching between dominant/submissive. After a while I discovered that I wasn't much of a switch, but wanted to play out submissive fantasies only. That was embarrassing since men in my country are expected to be strong and dominant in every situation. Luckily I have a wife that admitted to not being comfy about being submissive like so many other women and rather wanting to take charge. So we started to sement permanent and static roles as a dominant female and asubmissive male. I'm not going to elaborate much on that, but the point is that you can start somewhere. We started without much complexity. The most important thing is the mindset, for example we started out with that always having her permission before orgasm and that I always had to jerk off while she was watching.

  2. I start the count down from 100 or 75 make it last as a great big tease. That's what he needs and wants. Have fun.

  3. I'm not going to say this is wrong, but most the time my slave can cum within about 5 seconds after he is instructed, and he holds back very well when told not to. He and I have been partners for a while and he hasnt came without permission since our first session.

  4. Every Sunday in out Dom sub relationship is punishment day. I awaken by bringing my mistress to oral orgasm. On Sunday it's a minimum of 5 orgasms.
    Then I start my household chores which include making her breakfast in bed cleaning and other domestic chores.
    The afternoon is the first punishment session and depends on the nature of my weekly transgressions. Kneeling in the corner for extended time. Licking her feet and ass. And my spanking. She also edges me multiple times.
    After I prepare a gourmet dinner begins my grooming and bathing her. Doing her hair nails etc. Then begins more intense punishment including paddling where I bend over and must stand on tiptoe without my heels ever touching the ground. If I have been really bad during the week my balls are paddled or whipped too.
    As the evening progresses I must fuck her to multiple orgasms holding in my orgasm of course. By the end of the day she must reach at least 10 orgasms or I will not be allowed to cum.
    At precisely 11:59 I am finally allowed to cum. By this time my cock has been hard for many hours throughout the day. I have 1 minute to cum and she counts down the seconds. My goal is to cum within the last 10 seconds and my performance determines how many times I will be allowed to cum the following week. If I fail to cum in 1 minute I must wait until the following Sunday. In the early days I went up to a month without cumming until I was properly trained. This Sunday ritual has gone on for several years and is a mainstay of our Dom sub relationship.

  5. Whats it he point in not cumming. blue balls is painful....

  6. The point in not cumming and getting painful blue balls is that's what my Domme wants and I love to obey Her. My balls then remind me all day that She owns my cock.

  7. Thank you for this very well documented post Madam. This is a practice i enjoy doing a lot and i am fully operational at level 1 and 2. Level 3 is more difficult, may be i am less interested in becoming an expert in ruined orgasms !

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