Anilingus, A.K.A. Rimming

As kids, we're constantly told not to put dirty things in our mouths. So it's no surprise that of all forms of anal play, anilingus is most likely to cause repulsion in your partner. Anilingus (sometimes spelled analingus) is commonly known as "rimming," or as a "rim job," but "tossing the salad" is becoming a more common term as well. If this doesn't sound like your thing, please don't run away quite yet!

Have you ever gotten turned on from someone sucking or nibbling on your earlobe? Nipples? Or when someone kisses the back of your neck? Well this is the dominant equivalent. The anal opening is highly sensitive, and it's stimulation can produce erotic sensations and sexual excitement. It feels good. Having an orgasm while receiving a rim job is a wonderful experience. I don't even want to admit how much I enjoy it. If you've never experienced this, put it on your to-do list. It can also be very humiliating and degrading for your sub. There is hardly a more submissive act than licking someone else's asshole. Some even consider it the ultimate act of submission. I've found that while a lot of subs won't bring it up, when asked, a majority of them are interested. If it isn't a hard limit for your sub - and this is different than scat, poop does not come into play here - then make a goal to try it out. It's truly a bonding experience for a domme and her sub.

When rimming, your sub should use both his lips and tongue. Have your sub work up and down your ass crack, teasing your asshole. As he focuses in he can work circles around your pucker, and go back and forth over it. Then have him "kiss" you right on your starfish; softly at first, but working up to a passionate kiss. Poking in gently with his tongue and making circles - this is probably where the name rimming comes from. I also suggest you have him work his tongue in and out more deeply to see if you enjoy that sensation. I prefer the tongue going in a little and working the rim of my asshole. Have your sub play around to find what you like best. I suggest you try masturbating at the same time. Not only because it can help you relax and enjoy the experience, but because the two really do go well together.

People think there is a high risk of disease with rimming, but the risks are much lower for monogamous couples. The biggest danger is Hepatitis A, which can be transmitted from oral-anal contact. But you can't transmit a disease you don't have! This simply makes the raw act only for those in monogamous relationships. On that note, it's always a good idea to get your play partner(s) and yourself tested once (or before!) things start to get serious. If you are unsure of your partner or simply want to minimize all risks of infection, you can use a dental dam, but it's really not the same experience. A much better solution is to use a piece of plastic wrap. (Yes, it's safe.) You can "glue" it into place using a bit of lube. You can even tuck it into your asshole with a finger - or tongue - to hold it in place. The sensations is almost identical this way and it preserves the visuals which add to the dominating and humiliating effects of the act.

If you aren't using a dental dam or plastic wrap, but want to be extra clean, you can give yourself an enema beforehand, but this really feels like overkill for cleaning such a small area. I do however suggest you shower and clean the area with soap before you play. If you're worried about what your sub might taste or want to be a little cleaner, I've discovered a useful trick. Lube up a thin dildo, anything you're comfortable with, and work it in and out of your ass a couple times. Wipe it off, and start again with more lube. If you are getting particulate then repeat until it comes out clean. Voilà, no taste left but that of the lube! You can even have your sub do it for you. If you go the enema route because you're worried about your sub's experience, I still suggest following up with a lubed dildo; it really does work.

One thing you should avoid is your sub going from ass to pussy. I feel like everyone should know this, but just in case some don't, the vagina has an entirely different culture than your ass and you should be careful not to bring anything over from your ass. If your pet is going to move on to cunnilingus, have him rinse his mouth with mouthwash first, and always clean any toys and etc. before going from ass to vagina. It's easy to get lost in the heat of the moment and break this rule. Hell, I've done it myself! But at least know the risks ahead of time and watch closely for any signs of infection afterwards. There's a greatly increased risk of getting a UTI and you can get a nasty yeast infection from it as well.

I know this sounds like a lot of warnings, but with a little bit of caution it's really quite safe. It's also highly enjoyable and a great bonding experience for you and your sub. If you're still unsure, don't overthink it; just do it. You only experience the pleasurable side of it, and many subs find it to be a deeply satisfying and submissive experience. If your pet is unsure about it, tell him it isn't for his pleasure but yours. This reinforces your dominance and will help put him in a submissive mood. If he really doesn't like it, he can always use his safe word. If your sub is hesitant, or you're just looking for a more enthusiastic participant, make sure he's really horny first. Make him do it before he can come after a session of teasing and denial, or at the end of a period of denied orgasms. Subs are always most perverted when they're at their horniest.